Worthless
by ElwynClark
Summary: Daryl has a few reoccurring nightmares and learns more about Merle in the process. Daryl & Merle have been gender swapped in this! They're both girls. FYI. One-shot. Rated M for language and abuse violence.


HEY EVERYONE. LONG TIME NO WRITE. But on a serious note, blurgh.

Stumbled into the Walking Dead this summer and yah..

**IMPORTANT-I GENDER SWAPPED THE DIXON BROTHERS SO THEY'RE THE DIXON SISTERS**. They're still both Daryl and Merle because reasons. (Merle can sound like a girl's name if you say it over and over again different ways, and sometimes girls can have boys' names, so Daryl stays Daryl.)

**ALSO**, this is my own alternate universe.. in which Merle didn't die. So. Yup.

**T****HIS is a ****one shot**. I might write more for fem Dixons because reasons, I don't know yet though.

If yah like it, let me know. It was just an idea I had randomly. Because Daryl and Merle are like, I want to cuddle them. Thanks!

And as always, "The Walking Dead" belongs to it's rightful owner, not me!

3, ELWYNCLARK!

* * *

For one day, she wanted to know what it felt like not to be stared at, not to be put down. She wanted to know what it was like to be normal, whatever that was. She was sitting as far back into her closet as she could get. Holding her knees to her chest and trying not to make a sound.

"Where are ya, ya little bitch." She heard her father yell from down the hall. It was closer than the last time. She held her breath as the door to her room swung open and crashed into the dresser right next to it.

I'm not gonna take it today she thought to herself as she squeezed her eyes shut. He's not gonna touch me- her thought got broken off as the closet door clattered open and she felt herself get jerked up.

"I asked ya nicely Dar, I asked ya to do the dishes like a good girl." He said as he shook her.

"I did them Dad." She managed to squeak out. He stared at her in disgust, he reeked of alcohol.

"I already did them." She stared at the floor, staring at his filthy feet. Her eyes started to water from the smell of his sweat and his breath.

"Wanna explain this then?" He yelled as he pushed her towards the door of her room. She down the hall to the kitchen and he stumbled after her. He grabbed her by her light brown hair. "Yer not leaving this room till the dishes are done." He muttered as he whipped her head around to see the sink, with a bowl and a spoon in it.

She cringed at his tight grip and glared at the two items in the sink. He ate after she did them, she couldn't win. She never could. He pushed her into the sink and stared at her while she moved to get the dish soap and sponge. She cleaned the bowl and spoon and swore she felt more water on her face from her tears than on her hands from the tap.

She turned around and stared at the floor again. She could see his dirty feet on the other side of the room. They started to move closer to her and she took a deep breath. Her father moved her hair out from her face and pulled her head up to look at him then dropped his hand.

"Thank you sweetheart." She stared at him with an expressionless face. "What, no answer fer yer old man?" He slapped her hard across her face and she fell towards the cupboards nearby the sink.

"You're welcome." She choked out as she gained her balance near the counter. She brushed her hand past where he slapped her then stood up.

"What, no manners?" He approached her and she stood still. "I thought I taught ya better."

"You're welcome." She said at a normal volume and he still ignored her.

"Turn around pissmuffin." He growled and she reluctantly turned around. She heard his belt jingle as he undid it and pulled it out of his pants. She held onto the counter and squeezed her eyes shut. She screamed the first time the belt struck her. He whipped his belt again and she yelped and collapsed onto the counter. "Stand up, ya bitch." He yelled and jerked her back to stand straight. She let go of the counter and brushed back some of her hair from her face as he wound up to hit again.

"FUCK YOU." She yelled as his belt cracked across her back for the third time. She spun around and pushed him away. "I SAID YOU'RE WELCOME. WHAT ELSE DO YA WANT?" She screamed and he stared at her and dropped his belt on the ground.

"Ya really are just like your mother." He said and grabbed by her wrists and pulled her down the hallway. "A worthless bitch." She felt her back sting from the three lashes today, more scars. Tears ran down her face as he pulled her into his bedroom.

"Dad, stop." She pleaded as he grabbed something out of his closet and tried to hold onto her while she thrashed, trying to escape. He tied both of her hands together with a bandanna and pushed her onto the bed. "NO." She tried screaming then he wrapped another bandanna around her head and gagged her mouth. She cried and tried to get off the bed but he kept pushing her back down. He pulled down his own pants and boxers and she closed her eyes.

She knew this day was coming. She felt her jeans get jerked down followed by her panties. The abuse had gotten worse the past few years, and she knew he would rape her eventually. She made as much noise as she could through the gag as he thrusted inside her multiple times, making her bleed. He shoved her off the bed and she tumbled to the ground. She opened her eyes right as her jeans and panties were flung at her face.

"Do the dishes girl." He said and pulled her off the ground and dumped her in the hallway. She stared at the floor as he walked back into his bedroom then left again. She saw him at the end of the hallway, he was fully clothed again and had on his boots too. He grabbed the keys to his truck by the door and looked back at her.

"You'e worthless. No one's ever gonna care about ya." He said and flung open the front door and slammed it behind him as he left.

She sat there, with her hands still behind her back tied up and a gag on her mouth and cried like she's never cried before. And she had cried many times before. She saw the blood coming out of her naked lower half and cringed. She'd seen her own blood before, but never that much. She just sat there this time and cried.

Daryl jolted awake in her bed and looked around at her surroundings; still at the Prison. She ran her hands down her face and smoothed back her hair. She leaned over the edge of her top bunk a little to see if Merle was still there. Rick asked her to keep an eye on Merle since she came back to the prison nearly dead this time.

"What are ya doing Darlina?" She asked the moment Daryl's head popped over the edge of the bed.

"Nothin." She muttered and flopped back down in her bed.

"Which one was it?" Merle asked. She was wide awake, staring at the bottom of Daryl's bunk. Daryl didn't answer. Merle thought for a second and looked down at her bandaged chest. "Hey, Darlina." She said and kicked her bunk so the entire mattress jumped. Merle winced slightly and placed her three fingered hand on her bullet wound.

"Fuck you Merle, stop it." She muttered then stayed silent. Merle smirked, she always got a kick out of bullying her little sister. She looked at her bandaged self in the darkness again and sighed, still worth it. Daryl stared at the wall across from her and took a deep breath. "It was the one of Dad raping me, again." Merle swallowed hard. She knew it was her fault. She knew that he wouldn't have done that if she stuck around longer. If she was there for Daryl.

"How old were you?" She asked after a silence.

"Thirteen." Daryl said quietly and pulled her blanket closer to her face, trying to block out everything.

"Ya know Dad raped me once." Merle said after a long silence.

"Really?"

"Honest."

"How old were yah?"

"Fourteen, maybe thirteen. I don't remember. It was the first time got back from Juvie though. You were still little."

"Oh." Daryl said softly.

"And after that, I just didn't care. That's why I wasn't around Daryl." The top bunk was silent. "Is yer ass listening to me?" It was still silent. Merle kicked the bed again, and no response. She kicked it again with more force and Daryl tumbled off of it and landed on the floor. "Fuck." Merle muttered and coughed a few times and took a deep breath.

"Ya suck Merle."

"I know." She said in a tired tone then looked at Daryl tangled in her blanket on the floor.

"Ya said ya didn't care anymore, about what?" Daryl asked, as she got untangled.

"Anything. Dad, school, my body. Do ya know what the boys called me in high school Darlina?" Daryl shook her head. "Dirty Dixon." Merle hung her head for a minute. "I did drugs. I smoked. I fucked anyone who wanted a fuck. I used to-"

"I remember the day you left Merle ya made me promise not to do any of the shit you did." Merle looked at Daryl sitting on the floor. She had untangled from her blanket, and sat there with it draped over her like her poncho.

"Did ya?" Merle asked after noticing Daryl kind of looked like a little kid sitting there on the floor.

"Nothing much. I still smoked. A ton of boys tried to get in my pants but I didn't want it." Daryl shook her head and then looked at Merle. "It's like, when it happened to you, ya just decided to let everyone take advantage of you. When it happened to me, I just shut everyone out."

"Ya still do that Daryl." Merle said after a silence. "Thank you."

"Fer what?"

"For keeping your promise. I tried to keep mine."

"Ya promised me?"

"Yeah, that I was gonna take care of ya. And here ya are taking care of me." Daryl smiled and climbed back to the top bunk.

"Yer welcome Merle." Daryl said. She rolled over and faced the wall. Hoping her other nightmare didn't creep into her mind.

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WEO. Talk about a dramatic comeback for myself..

What'd ya'll think? Review, Follow, Fave, Do what ya feel. I'm cool with whatever.

Thanks for reading!

- ElwynClark


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